On Turning 34

I turned 34 earlier this week and it was uneventful. It's somewhat heartening and disheartening to consider that we do all our aging in the twelve months preceding our birthday, and so nothing actually happens on the date. So what, I technically got older, but I was doing that all year. But also, I want to feel somehow different on my birthday and I just never really do. 

Turning 34 | www.biblio-style.com

My perennial request of the DJ at Fallen Timbers around 1am on boozy Saturday night. 

But I'm a gal who loves a fresh start. I like to begin things on Monday, or the 1st of the month, or New Years Day. There's something so clean about it, and my birthday is always a nice mid-year refresh. On my 30th, I wrote a 5-year plan that I'm now in a sprint to complete, although there are some goals to toss out the window because I could not have foreseen how much I would not care about them five years later. But in general, for this year, my goals are slim. 


Taking action. 

Taking trips. 

Taking PTO.


Email checking on the weekends.

Seltzers, malt liquor and shitty alcohol in general. 

I should say less online shopping, but my heart's not in it. 

I'm very much leaning into a happy complacency, where things are mostly good and that's good enough. I no longer have the youthful optimism/ambition to be a big shot at anything. I don't aspire for anyone to know my name the way I used to. I just want to enjoy the evening. Enjoy a cold bottle of wine. Enjoy good company. Enjoy dinner. Enjoy a game of Uno. A freshly toasted bagel. The sunset. Etc. 


I remember reading snippets that suggested the 30's are a great decade and rolling my eyes to the moon. How could the 30's possibly be better than the 20's? I get it now - I really do. I wish my skin looked like it did when I was 25 and certainly wish I could wake up unscathed after a night of drinking the way I could in my 20's, but otherwise, I do feel myself calming down and that's an even trade in my opinion. As this Reddit implies, I have to start budgeting and it's lovely how naturally it happens. Getting older is a gift, for all the obvious mortality reasons, but there's so much to look forward to. The faucet running dry for instance. 

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